04 Aug 10 Reasons Why Spirits Connect with Us
by Tiffany Harelik, MA, RYT
Everyone’s how and why may be a little different—but if we are open to listening with an ear of the heart—we find our loved ones and Spirit are never far away.
The main message I offer through Spirits is: Live your life, enjoy every moment. We are here for a good time, not a long time. Savor every bite. Feel your physicality. But the truth is there are other reasons Spirits want to connect with us. Hear are ten:
1. An Apology
When an apology is owed, there is a significant shift in the energy. After I’ve identified the Soul, it’s often the most prominent feeling I experience. Example: I have a man who is a father figure coming in for you. He had a nickname – would you understand Beks? He’s coming forward with an apology—is this something you feel is directed to you? [insert tears]. I have read apologies from abusive fathers/husbands, alcoholic family members, people who caused a great amount of chaos and harm while they were alive, etc. Sometimes the client is ready to hear the apology, but not always. Sometimes an apology comes through and is met with a cold shoulder. The energy drops. I smooth it over by reminding them the apology is there anytime they want to take it, and to keep seeking the inner work of forgiveness for their own mental and emotional health.
2. An Acknowledgement
To help their loved one know it’s not their fault, that they couldn’t have done anything differently. That it was their time to go—these acknowledgements help the living Soul forgive themselves, and help them to start living their life again.
3. A Message of Gratitude
Spirit wants to thank us. Sometimes the healing moments come in knowing that an aging parent with dementia really did hear the conversations the family was having around them. Or how grateful they were for the incredible care they received at their time of crossing. Or for the way their funeral arrangements were handled – with showing me specific elements of the funeral for the client to really feel this reading is real.
In a recent reading, I was describing a cross in the Sky, and asked if that meant anything special. The client said that yes, there was a huge cross-shaped cloud in the Sky after her loved ones funeral – this made the reading believable to her, and she left with a sense of peace that her loved one was thankful for all she had done to make the funeral special.
In another reading, the client provided great care for her father, who seemed out of it for the last several months. But I was able to validate some things she did and said that he heard, and that he was finally able to say thank you for being such a good and loyal daughter. A very healing moment for both sides.
4. A Message they are still with us
Spirits want us to feel their love. Two of the most remarkable readings I have given involved a wedding that occurred after a loved one had passed. In one, a grandmother showed me her granddaughter was married in a traditional Asian wedding dress which was red. In another, a bride-to-be’s father came through to say he would be walking her down the aisle. When I asked for a clear clarification that would leave no doubt in our minds this message was from him, he said: sand dollar. As it turns out, the bride-to-be was cleaning out their fireplace, far away from any ocean just the night prior. At the bottom of the fireplace, she found a sand dollar full and intact. This blew my mind.
In a recent group reading, one woman just wanted to feel a connection to her friend in Spirit: Is she still here? Does she hang out with us? I just want to feel her. As I started the reading, I described her friend as volleying a tennis ball back to her from the Heavens. Unbeknownst to me, their friend group had been playing pickleball the night before and this was an indication to them that yes, their friend was still around and hanging out with them.
Spirits want their loved ones to know they are at peace. Mothers of children who have committed suicide, friends who “should have” died in the car with them, family members who have survivors guilt—they just want to know their loved ones are at peace.
One client knew not to let her boyfriend go for a drive, she felt she could have prevented his death. Twenty years later it continued to haunt her. In our reading, I was able to show her that in fact there was nothing she could have done to prevent him from driving that night. Evidence of his peace in the afterlife came through with an illustration of his current spiritual walk. He showed me that he was quite atheistic in human form, but as a free flying spirit he had much more to say about his experience of God as all encompassing, all loving, etc. This was mind blowing to the client, and felt true to her. It gave her peace that he found his peace on the other side.
6. To Validate Information
Sometimes Spirits want to validate information for their living loved ones—that their wills have been handled correctly, that they approve of their living loved one’s new boyfriend, that they see their new living grandchildren and enjoy hearing them practice piano.
7. To Give Answers
Spirit wants to provide truth, with integrity. When people die for unknown reasons, their living loved ones long for answers. Sometimes a suicide is actually a homicide and vice versa. Sometimes simple knowing of what happened can provide profound peace.
In a reading for a friend’s friend—the deceased father showed me he passed of an electrical issue between the head and the heart. The family had suspected the hospital hadn’t plugged in his pacemaker, which would have been the actual cause of death. Their suspicions were validated in this reading. It brought them immense peace to know there truly was nothing they could have done. I wrote about this session in a blog post.
8. To Solve a Mystery or Crime: Closure
Spirits want to assist us in finding missing people, or to find closure when they have been involved in an unsolved crime. Missing People is a huge area of forensic mediumship that is very close to my heart. In some cases, we get the opportunity to help connect a missing or murdered individual with their living loved ones, or to provide a safe space to say goodbye.
9. To Find Lost Items
Sometimes Spirit wants to help a person find a missing object. For example, a client lost her wedding ring. Using Remote Viewing to connect with our Guides, I was able to locate her ring in a parking lot.
10. To Say I Love You
Spirit just wants to say, “I love you.” We’re not always able to be there at the time our loved ones crossover. Sometimes Spirit wants to offer a hug, and an “I Love You”—which means everything. Absolutely everything.